No matter what...
. . . . . i w o n ' t l e t g o . . . . .
abby:
loves: kevin and food. you decide which one she loves more
hates: hypocrites and loud fat chicks (i'm a hypocrite in saying that. i'm big boned) and a lot
more. kevin says i hate a lot. -_-
teh blah blah: i love j-pop, k-pop and jdoramas. anime is an addition and when i get a fix i go on binges. that goes for gaming too. (final fantasy vii rocks my world)i listen to whatever music i want. if i'm not eating then i'm cooking. or i'm gaming. w00t w00t =^.^= . i like to sleep. yeah. that sounds about right. anime, sleep, gaming, eat, kevin.
sigh. ever yet busy with school and work. let's mush that between kevin's birthday, our year anniversary, and my birthday! oh yeah... i'm doing a halloween birthday party at his house this sunday! please come by and if you wanna dress up. i'll be having a scary movie marathon!! probably gory japanese movie cuz i'm into that. -_-U
hope you like the new layout. the old one was giving me some trouble. i'm in the processing of updating links so msg me if you have a new one! =^.^=
that's it for now!
i won't let go... 6:50 PM
busy with school and work and kevin. i felt a lil better about reading a lot of tagalog the other night. i didn't feel so stupid and i realized that i wasn't too bad. kevin is still better than me- but yeah- i never read tagalog at all! and he went to school in the philippines so it's obvious why he'd be better. but for a tagalog illiterate girl
i'm antsy. i don't know what it is. me n the pup are fighting. he just doesn't want to talk to my mom. i understand why. he thinks she hates him. i think she dislikes him. who knows what my mother thinks? it doesn't help that he tries to dance around the edges and avoids her as much as possible. my mom doesn't know him- which is a good and a bad thing. for one thing i think she thinks he's stupid. that really insults me and kevin. i can't stand stupid people and kevin isn't inferior to me. we're equal. he's stronger in somethings - but then so am i. it balances out. i'm just to annoyed with that balancing act between him and my mom. he points out when she calls she doesn't even say hi to him. my mother is rude, but he knew that already. i know she's been trying so hard to be nice to me lately but it still hurts she and kevin don't get along.
I'm still mad at my sister. I don't think she gets it. Last last Sunday mom said to my cousin marice that next time we go on vacation, we'll bring her along. Then my sister says "next time we'll bring you instead of ate" that hurt. and i told her it did. she said nothing but "what? you hate going with us anyway" but she never said sorry. She doesn't know that what she says sometimes hurts- and till she realizes it i'm not gonna talk to her. so there!
dunno if i'm gonna do the breast cancer walk. people are flaky and it's hard to get the team going. i'm bummed by that. boo flaky asians. boo
i won't let go... 11:12 PM
jesus christ kaha. no one reads this shit anymore. not even kevin. (stalker.... it's been 2 years). i guess you're the only one that truly loves me kaha.
yeah. no one cares. but anywhoo.... today i went to work at 6am and decided i wanted to kill this one bitch at work. i called kevin during my break and told him that i might go postal and that no matter what happens- i'll love him. and i promised not to throw myself down the stairs anymore. (the baby means more to him than me) why do i want to kill this girl? because she demands to be the center of attention. and i feel it is my job to give equal rights to other girls by taking
her attention and giving it to everyone else. of course i don't need to worry cuz i'm abby. abby's are kick ass and automatically steal all the attention from the room w/o trying causing car accidents (this has nothing to do with being a female asian driver) and the sun refuses to shine if it wasn't for abby's smile. well this bitch flaunts her rack around and makes it worse by talking like a damn asian. not that i hate asians (cause i am one =^.^= pinay pride yo)- just... have you ever
listened to asians? i'm sorry if you did. they're LOUD. so think of this chick with a big rack and equally loud mouth. NOT FUCKABLE. but is VERY fuck-able. so yes... back to my story- i am playing the role of buffy from the last season and sharing the gift to all girls.
but then i saw cookies and got distracted. kevin promised to make me cookies. big kev helped him make the dough... now it's stuck in the fridge. it's easier to buy cookies than ask kevin to make them when he's in trouble. so i buy cookies and tell him he's in trouble for not making me cookies for being in trouble. double trouble for kevin = double cookies for abby.
best compliment of the week --> "your scrunch rolls are beautiful!" -trish
worst compliment of the week --> "your eyes are beautiful" - kevin
best insult by abby this week--> " omg there's a giant katamary in the mall! wait no. it's a fat chick with the 3 kids she sat on."
YES YES. i am TIRED and FULL of COFFEE from DEAN and DELUCA!
OH THE GERMS!
i won't let go... 11:34 PM
i'm torn into pieces. i'm screaming and i don't want you to hear me. not anymore. no more. i'm strong. i don't need you. i'll dust myself off and walk away from it all. *see i can flutter better than you thought* i am putting up my walls to give you your freedom. leave me be. don't tell me to eat. don't tell me not to push my body to the limits. don't tell me i'm fragile. fuck that. i'll throw myself against everything you have got to offer just to show you i'm stronger than that. i'm better than that. i don't care what you do. i don't care. your life is yours. let's keep it simple like that. thank you lena st. clair for the inspiration on the fire escape.
i won't let go... 12:37 AM
ai-ya! i'm never on the computer anymore! so no more myspace checking like you losers... and no time to update moblogs..... sadness. simon- gomen about the gaming- kevin kidnapped me and brought me to some isolated cabin on lake michigan where he tried to seduce me with drugs then eat my brain out..... not that fun... okay so right now my right eye is pretty much fucked right now so i'm kinda blind. i think i should wear a patch. ARRR damn i'd be sexy.. "welcome to arrrbercrombie! have you checked out arrr great fittin' jeans?" yah i'm a dork. eh... kids remember that we're doing girls take guys out so save up your money cuz mark isn't a cheap date... -_- ... some ape is staring at me- must go.. ja!
i won't let go... 5:09 PM
WHOO! ^_^U gomen about the last post! it was kinda hectic back there!in case you didn't know- abby (haha i'm talking in the third person again...) *ahem* abby was having a really rough time the last couple of weeks. compared to the other stuff she's ever written about - this pretty much takes the cake. uhm. my apologies to the pple that i seemingly ignored. i didn't have my phone, computer, or any form of communication at hand (no pigeons, smoke signals, or living in the dark ages- against homeowner cc&r's) uhm. i don't know where to begin. it's been interesting. my parents almost kicked my outta the house and took everything away from me. after that my car got towed! (oh my poor baby... momma's sorry about that) and now my parents know about kevin (damn metro i'm positively crazy about you). my best friend and i havent been talking and that took a lot outta me. i tried not to show it but it wore on my day after day until i just numbed myself to it. i'm worried about school too. damn. last thursday was killer. chem and anatomy praticum. REALLY worried about something else too... i lose sleep thinking about it... err... that. oh well! met an anime cat lady on thursday that proved WEIRD esp when she had an "accident" i should elaborate sometime.... haha.... TODAY was ACTION PACKED!!! (not as much as thursday though)got a newbie buddy at dance today and DANCED THROUGH THE PAIN! and i found out i have the ability to get hired. hah. ate out with the fab 5 and it was fucking hilarious. *that's a knee slapper rite there* i miss bein with you guys. taught my 7 yr old cousin to play poker and blackjack that was awesome. and now it's playing the not sleeping game with the 4 rite now (mark drive home safe- you got my love alex with you HAHA).... i hear anakin screaming NOOOOO downstairs... dammit. i love laughing at that part.
*gaming with the remaining 4*
^cuz that's what jumbo cactuars do
i won't let go... 2:28 AM
LIES. jaded. LIES. a fool. i'm nothing but a fool.
i won't let go... 2:34 PM
i'm lying here with just a towel on. it's not safe.
my parents grounded me. *shrug* they put the club into my car. they took my keys away from me (so clubbing my car was completely uncalled for. *sigh* how that red bar mars the perfection of integgy). i haven't seen my phone for god knows how long. i'm not really allowed out of my room. the computer is in grace's room and so i snuck into it when they weren't looking. they allowed me to go to one place: church. and as i got ready, i had a panic attack(?)who knows. all i knew was that the shower was incredibly scary. i knew i wasn't able to stand up at one point. grace heard me and talked to me- but what she said- i don't know. i heard my body banging on the walls as i tried to support myself long enough to rinse off the soap. i forgot how to breathe. i closed my eyes and i knew that just made it worse. i was blacking out. i threw myself out of the shower and sat dripping on the cold marble praying that i'll regain majority of my consciousness long enough to go to church. dad would get pissed if i didn't. dad was pissed & didn't seem interested in my dizzy spell. so i'm lying here while grace and dad are gone.
*withdrawing into myself*
^cuz that's what jumbo cactuars do
i won't let go... 1:57 PM
breast cancer awareness pple! hope yur all doing yur part or else i'll come there and personally kick yur butt! *ka-pow!* jeez i haven't updated. okay quick run- back to school and it's a bitch. but we all know that. the trees there according to kevin "are having sex" cuz of the way they smell. but we all know that too. my hair... ouch. i don't know what i'm doing there. but we've known that forever! jon and i didn't make it through our 6th month. but.. what can i say about that? julian is my break up buddy *sigh tiffa* but wer knew i'm technically his maid. my toothbrush head has to be changed. *soo random i know!* (oh duck you're so cute!) i don't know what else i'm doing -_- . so bad. but i'm tired! oh yeah- don't forget that memoirs is coming this dec soooo please remember! huh- almost forgot.. i'm almost 21!! 10 days! wooot! *wait, did i just w00t? next thing i'm saying.. wait... typing shit like "1 4m 4 l33t h4x0r!" which i am btw =^.^=*
*hestitating*^cuz that's just what jumbo cactuars do.
i won't let go... 8:12 PM
goodbye to long hair! i chopped it off! sorry for never updating but this is the last thing on my mind these days! i'm terribly sorry for not updating! i guess i got wrapped up in life. warped was awesome, i spent it with the 4 awesomest pple in the world. (
marice, chris, grace n jon) fun times lounging in the pool with a hookah in one hand and singing at the stars! doing shows with my emos was great (dLd with part of the "fuck the world" crew ... live love burn DIE!!! fuck the world let's go skating! >initiate mosh < ) to my thrice buddy
chris: thank you for watching out for me- and i promise never to leave you like that again.(hey i did go after you!) a sincere thanks to my tummy savers that rescued me while i was waiting for wicked tickets. and to
andy n allan thanks for helping out with the car mods... shut up i know it's purple. updates: sushi challenge is ON. i am the ref and it's my lil girls
grace n marice vs the husky boys
jon n andrew. we'll see what happens. i've got micheal buble tomorrow (my love!!) and plenty of road trips. (call if you wanna come! it's an adventure to find good food in san francisco) i've got tix to 12 girls at the wilshire for my girls but please come! we must support the asian community! speaking of which... we got to (mugatu) see BI - he's awesome. man this is a lot. i'm sorry about the pple i didn't get a chance to hang out with this summer. esp you
mike i have a shit load of work to do but that's no excuse. hopefully we can see john williams together. it's a flurry of fingers rite now cuz i don't remember what i've been up to. working on posting pics of my events but even in that i got lazy. damn this weather- makes me lazy.
i won't let go... 11:37 AM
I adopted a cute lil' tempura fetus
from Fetusmart! mm..yummy.